Updated: Dec 13, 2020
As I progress though my life, in many ways it becomes a quiet tale about nothing. The things I thought mattered didn’t. The precious things were not precious. Nor were the sacred things sacred. Everything was the opposite of what I thought. The realization that I had wasted so much energy on things that later would have no significance, in itself was an epiphany moment.
Nothing mattered the way it used to. The linear systems started to disappeared and there was a sense of freedom in that. The stories that I had told myself were nothing more the silly children’s stories. There was no monster under the bed. I didn’t need protection from anything. Nothing was going to hurt me. The worst things had not happened and the sky had not fallen in. The only thing I ever had to fear was fear itself. In all fairness, that is a daunting adversary.
Fear breeds more fear. The more I played in the fear game the worse things became. The mind creates more catastrophic scenarios that aren’t true. The moment I realized that all of the stories were in my mind things become clearer. I could decide to feed my energy into doubt and worry but that was only feeding the old. It doesn’t get me anywhere. It was a merry go round that kept me in the same loop. I always say we create what we create. We choose what we choose. At some point I had to own that statement. That can feel like a daunting task. Especially when my linear world appears to cave in. I thought I could keep the old in place while the new rushed in, on its white horse to save me. That hypothesis was wrong.
Energetics would paint a vastly different picture. Its not a hard concept. The new energies could not come in while the old energies were there. The frequencies were to different. They can’t coexist together. It was impossible. It defies universal law. My ego resisted the new realities. Mostly because I couldn’t touch them. They could never fully materialize while I was clinging to the old.
Which makes it scarier. My ego would throw a hundred fits a day, telling the old horror stories of what would happen if I let the old go. In the end, I found that none of it was really true. Nothing catastrophic happened except the death of the old. My old life was gone and could not be resurrected. That life would only exist in stories, teaching tools for others. Leaps of faith are never one jump. Don’t ever believe that. It’s many jumps. It’s an ego death by a thousand cuts.
Every time I thought I had everything in order. More cracks in my realities would show. The more I saw the more I had to clean up. All had been bulldozed and left in the rear-view mirror. Honestly, there was not much to mourn. The tears came in letting it go. The fear came with the stories of what would happen if I let it go. The worst part of the old’s departure is the fear of what happens next. What horrible fairy tale could I make up?
The truth is nothing happened. All of it was fixable and locust did not descend. What did I learn? Realities will come and go. We know when it’s time, for we hear the soft swan song playing in the background. I had to embrace the concept that they were going for a reason. I had moved past them and what had once supported me was now holding me back.
It wasn’t a time for sadness. It was a time for excitement. Shifting my perception was the key. My view point, had been distorted in previous realities. It couldn’t see the chains and shackles of the fear game. Once I could see them, I couldn’t stay. The fear of walking away was worse than the walk itself. It truly was “much ado about nothing.”